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195712 [2018/11/20 11:29] tyreless195712 [2018/11/20 15:36] (current) tyreless
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 === Erratum. === === Erratum. ===
  
-Due to a misunderstanding, the date of our Christmas party was wrongly given in teh November issue as Saturday, 14th December. This should have been Wednesday, 18th December. Please see page 21 for details.+Due to a misunderstanding, the date of our Christmas party was wrongly given in the November issue as Saturday, 14th December. This should have been Wednesday, 18th December. Please see page 21 for details.
  
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-=====Caution - The Guffaw Listens!=====+===== Caution - The Guffaw Listens! =====
  
 The following document, or part thereof of a document, was found on the Club-room floor at 2139 hours on the night of Wednesday, 13th Nov. 1957. It was discovered by one of our members, and passed immediately to our President. The member reported that he heard an evil guffaw behind him, quite audibly, but when he looked around, there was not a soul in sight. Instead he found the document which is reproduced below. It is feared that the document may have some obscure connection with the forthcoming Rudolf Cup Boat Race. The following document, or part thereof of a document, was found on the Club-room floor at 2139 hours on the night of Wednesday, 13th Nov. 1957. It was discovered by one of our members, and passed immediately to our President. The member reported that he heard an evil guffaw behind him, quite audibly, but when he looked around, there was not a soul in sight. Instead he found the document which is reproduced below. It is feared that the document may have some obscure connection with the forthcoming Rudolf Cup Boat Race.
  
-====FLOP SECRET==== +=== Flop Secret. === 
-This document is FLOP SECRET. It must NOT fall into ENEMY hands, or the hands of any other Club. If found somewhere else, tear off and report to the President who will give a due-fly signed receipt.+ 
 +This document is FLOP SECRET. It must NOT fall into ENEMY hands, or the hands of any other Club. If found somewhere else, tear off and report to the President who will give a due-lly signed receipt. 
 123999-428/57 123999-428/57
-PLANS & SPECIFICATIONS + 
-For+Plans & Specifications for
-MACHINES ARTILLERY COUNTER-BOMBARDMENT OFFERING PIECEMEAL + 
-Type: Mark I 0.5 Flour  +=== Machines Artillery, Counter-Bombardment, Offering Piecemeal. === 
-Short Title: The MACBOP Mark One+ 
 +__Type: Mark I 0.5 Flour__ 
 + 
 +__Short Title__: The MACBOP Mark One 
 Maximum Range: 30 yards Maximum Range: 30 yards
-Effective Range: with FD Type Bomb (Dry) 10 yds. with FW Type Bomb (Wet) 20 " 
-Height of Trajectory at maximum range: 20 feet 
-Effective rate of fire (without interference): 20 Bombs per Hour 
-3360 " week 
-Effect on Enemy Morale: 
-With such a trajectory the weapon is essentially a weapon of surprise. Using both types of bomb the effect on enemy morale is devastating. On first indications they turn PALE. Provided the 
-M.A.C.B.O.P. is used to best tactical advantage they are also likely to turn TALE and run. 
-Effective "Burst" area: Head and shoulders 
-Weight of Charge: Standard - Half pound Supercharge - Pound 
-Surcharge - sixpence per round 
-Medical Indications (Genevieve Convention 1955). 
-1) The bombed victim turns pale and manifests symptoms of being an albinoid. 
-2) Pulse rate goes up and the heart pounds 
-3) The victim sustains a temporary loss of sight 
-4) Breathing.may become difficult 
-5) With the W Type Bomb the victim may experience some difficulty in moving the limbs due to the glutinous nature of the charge after impact. 
-9. 
-6) Treatment of Victims, The application of a pinch of salt and sugar along with a little heat will effectively Damper the victim's sufferings. After cooking, removal is easy. Undertakers of such procedure should seek a doctor's approval before removal. 
-The President views this discovery with Some concern. On crosschecking with our "Scientific Development Sub-Committee" he gleaned that we have no offensive-weapon projects under way, due, in part, to a ,temporary lack of revenue. Such being the case, we are forced to draw the very serious conclusion that we have an unknown enemy within the camp. Further to such discovery, it would appear that the said  enemy is already well advanced in the development of the said weapons- project. 
-Due to the extreme seriousness of the situation, the Editor and several members have been clubbed together. As a result, they have ' offered the following reward: 
- REWARD  
-A Reward of One Thousand (1000) Hobs is offered for the apprehension, within the precincts of the  Club-rooms, of  the unknown person, or member, with the Evil Guffaw.' 
-FOR ALL YOUR TRANSPORT PROBLEMS  CONTACT 
-HATSWELL'S TAXI & TOURIST SERVICE 
-RING, WRITE, WIRE or GALL 
-ANY HOUR, DAY or NIGHT 
-'PHONE: B'heath W459 or W151 Booking Office - 4 doors from Gardners Inn Hotel (LOOK FOR THE NEON SIGN) 
-SPEEDY 5 OR 8 PASSENGER CARS AVAILABLE 
-LARGE OR SMALL PARTIES CATERED FOR 
-FARES: KANANGRA WALLS 30/- per head (minimum 5 passengers) 
-PERRY'S LOOKDOWN ff If ff 
-JENOLAN STATE FOREST 20/- VI If ft 
-CARLON'S FARM 10/- " " ff 
-WE WILL BE PLEASED TO QUOTE OTHER TRIPS OR SPECIAL PARTIES ON APPLICATION 
  
-=====This is the "Goon" Type October Walks Report or "Rhubarb Rhubarb Rhubarb"=====+Effective Range: With FD Type Bomb (Dry) 10 yds. With FW Type Bomb (Wet) 20 yds. 
 + 
 +Height of Trajectory at maximum range: 20 feet. 
 + 
 +Effective rate of fire (without interference): 20 Bombs per Hour, 3360 Bombs per week. 
 + 
 +__Effect on Enemy Morale__: 
 + 
 +With such a trajectory the weapon is essentially a weapon of surprise. Using both types of bomb the effect on enemy morale is devastating. On first indications they turn PALE. Provided the M.A.C.B.O.P. is used to best tactical advantage they are also likely to turn TALE and run. 
 + 
 +__Effective "Burst" area__: Head and shoulders. 
 + 
 +__Weight of Charge__: Standard - Half pound. Supercharge - Pound. Surcharge - sixpence per round. 
 + 
 +__Medical Indications (Genevieve Convention 1955)__. 
 + 
 +  - The bombed victim turns pale and manifests symptoms of being an albinoid. 
 +  - Pulse rate goes up and the heart pounds. 
 +  - The victim sustains a temporary loss of sight. 
 +  - Breathing may become difficult. 
 +  - With the W Type Bomb the victim may experience some difficulty in moving the limbs due to the glutinous nature of the charge after impact. 
 +  - __Treatment of Victims__. The application of a pinch of salt and sugar along with a little heat will effectively Damper the victim's sufferings. After cooking, removal is easy. Undertakers of such procedure should seek a doctor's approval before removal. 
 + 
 +- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
 + 
 +The President views this discovery with some concern. On cross-checking with our "Scientific Development Sub-Committee" he gleaned that we have no offensive-weapon projects under way, due, in part, to a temporary lack of revenue. Such being the case, we are forced to draw the very serious conclusion that we have an unknown enemy within the camp. Further to such discovery, it would appear that the said enemy is already well advanced in the development of the said weapons-project. 
 + 
 +Due to the extreme seriousness of the situation, the Editor and several members have been clubbed together. As a result, they have offered the following reward: 
 + 
 +=== Reward. === 
 +  
 +A Reward of One Thousand (1000) Hobs is offered for the apprehension, within the precincts of the  Club-rooms, of  the unknown person, or member, with the Evil Guffaw. 
 + 
 +---- 
 + 
 +=== Hattswell's Taxi and Tourist Service. === 
 + 
 +For all your transport problems contact Hattswell's Taxi and Tourist Service. Ring, write, wire or call any hour, day or night. 
 + 
 +Telephone: Blackheath 129 or 249. Booking Office - 4 doors from Gardner's Inn Hote1 (look for the neon sign.) 
 + 
 +Speedy 5 or 8 passenger cars available. Large or small parties catered for. 
 + 
 +Fares: 
 + 
 +  * Kanangra Walls - 30/- per head (minimum 5 passengers) 
 +  * Perry's Lookdown - 3/- per head (minimum 5 passengers) 
 +  * Jenolan State Forest - 20/- per head (minimum 5 passengers) 
 +  * Carlon's Farm - 10/- per head (minimum 5 passengers) 
 + 
 +We will be pleased to quote other trips or special parties on application. 
 + 
 +---- 
 + 
 +===== This is the "Goon" Type October Walks Report. ===== 
 + 
 +or 
 + 
 +=== "RhubarbRhubarbRhubarb" === 
 Written by that "Charlie" B. Anderson - Walks Secretary Written by that "Charlie" B. Anderson - Walks Secretary
  
-The Place In the lounge room of Mr. Anderson's home at Coogee. +__The Place__: In the lounge room of Mr. Anderson's home at Coogee. Mr. Anderson is in his favourite lounge chair reading the Sunday papers.
-Mr. Anderson is in his favourite lounge chair reading the Sunday papers+
-The Time It's 7.30 p.m., Sunday evening. +
-The Action His son, Brian turns on the radio +
-The Result- A riot. Because from the radio is heard - "This the HOME +
- Service of the B.B,C. We present, (pause) the highly esteemed GOON SHOW". (Burp) And from Mr Anderson, (no pause) "Turn that b---- programme off. It's nothing more than unadulterated ridiculous trash and nonsense, only fit for the minds of ratbags".+
  
-Which of course brings MB back to the October Walks Report, Actually this is where the report really begins. +__The Time__: It'7.30 p.m., Sunday evening.
-My friend, spy and also famed international idiot, Count Moriarty has reported to me strange carrying-ons, concerning a party of twelve Charlies who dilly-dallied down the Dilly during the October lung weekend. It would appear that Major Bloodknock'niece, Miss Margaret +
- Ryan (especially imported from Ireland to 'do this job) had surreptitiously poured vast volumes of Creme de Menthe and Benedictine into her innocent fellow walkers and talkersIn fact, this campaign was +
-so successful, the leaders and party were rendered powerless against +
-the fantastic forces of white antismNeedless to say, the party didn'+
-go over Beloon Pass into the Nattai Riverbut carried on down the +
-Wollondilly to Central Burragorang.+
  
-At this stage I'd like to point out that Beloon Pass is not to be +__The Action__: His son, Brian turns on the radio. 
-confused with the South Col of Everest. This has been a very common mistake with many of our members. Probably this mistake is due to the fact that the number of unsuccessful S.B.W. attempts to find and climb Baloon Pass is equal to the number of attempts on the South Col. + 
 +__The Result__: A riot. Because from the radio is heard - "This is the Home Service of the B.B.C. We present, (pause) the highly esteemed GOON SHOW". (Burp) And from Mr Anderson, (no pause) "Turn that b---- programme off. It's nothing more than unadulterated ridiculous trash and nonsense, only fit for the minds of ratbags"
 + 
 +Which of course brings me back to the October Walks Report. Actually this is where the report really begins. 
 + 
 +My friend, spy and also famed international idiot, Count Moriarty has reported to me strange carrying-ons, concerning a party of twelve Charlies who dilly-dallied down the Dilly during the October long weekend. It would appear that Major Bloodknock's niece, Miss Margaret Ryan (especially imported from Ireland to do this job) had surreptitiously poured vast volumes of Creme de Menthe and Benedictine into her innocent fellow walkers and talkers. In fact, this campaign was so successful, the leaders and party were rendered powerless against the fantastic forces of white antism. Needless to say, the party didn't go over Beloon Pass into the Nattai River, but carried on down the Wollondilly to Central Burragorang. 
 + 
 +At this stage I'd like to point out that Beloon Pass is not to be confused with the South Col of Everest. This has been a very common mistake with many of our members. Probably this mistake is due to the fact that the number of unsuccessful S.B.W. attempts to find and climb Baloon Pass is equal to the number of attempts on the South Col. 
  
 However, getting back to the subject, these now vanishing quantities of spirits were not the only contributing factors which changed the route of this trip. Pictures of bushfires and samples of water from dry creeks, not to mention the parties habitual habit of arguing on two vital subjects from daylight to dark also had a big part in influencing this solid party. These two controversial subjects may interest you, Miss Social Secretary, for a club evening. After seeing how twelve people argued, over them, heaven only knows what would happen at a club meeting. They were - However, getting back to the subject, these now vanishing quantities of spirits were not the only contributing factors which changed the route of this trip. Pictures of bushfires and samples of water from dry creeks, not to mention the parties habitual habit of arguing on two vital subjects from daylight to dark also had a big part in influencing this solid party. These two controversial subjects may interest you, Miss Social Secretary, for a club evening. After seeing how twelve people argued, over them, heaven only knows what would happen at a club meeting. They were -
 +
 a) Should a bushwalker marry another bushwalker? (of the opposite sex of course). a) Should a bushwalker marry another bushwalker? (of the opposite sex of course).
-b) Do Dance Halls lead to sin and sex?(and they mean more-than 5% too),+ 
 +b) Do Dance Halls lead to sin and sex? (and they mean more than 5% too).
  
 Now this is where the report really begins. Now this is where the report really begins.
  
 The other two long weekend walks failed to start due to lack of starters. The other two long weekend walks failed to start due to lack of starters.
-During the second weekend of October, Major Bloodknock of the Royal 5th Deserters (I have already mentioned this slob) summoned his car driven chauffeur and proceeded west to cover Colin Putt's walk in the south and John Noble's walk in the north. It goes without saying that the only report forthcoming was in the newspaper the other day where an army major was seen at Ayres Rock in a hysterical condition shouting "Putto! Putto! Putto!"+ 
 +During the second weekend of October, Major Bloodknock of the Royal 5th Deserters (I have already mentioned this slob) summoned his car driven chauffeur and proceeded west to cover Colin Putt's walk in the south and John Noble's walk in the north. It goes without saying that the only report forthcoming was in the newspaper the other day where an army major was seen at Ayres Rock in a hysterical condition shouting Putto! Putto! Putto!
  
 Dear readers, I agree with you, this Bloodknock character has the ear marks of being an ideal S.B.W. leader. Dear readers, I agree with you, this Bloodknock character has the ear marks of being an ideal S.B.W. leader.
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 Getting back to vital statistics, Colin was accompanied by ten members and two prospective Charlies. The trip has been reported as going per programme. However on the other hand John Noble's party of two prospectives were forced to turn back due to bushfires in the surrounding Cowan area. Getting back to vital statistics, Colin was accompanied by ten members and two prospective Charlies. The trip has been reported as going per programme. However on the other hand John Noble's party of two prospectives were forced to turn back due to bushfires in the surrounding Cowan area.
  
-With only one walk going as per programme so far, I ventured forth +With only one walk going as per programme so far, I ventured forth with mixed feelings and Neddy Seagoon to investigate the following weekends walking activities. On our way there, Neddy in his usual sophisticated way kept mumbling about some Charlie who when asked, "How did your walk go?", always broke out into operatic song. 
-with mixed feelings and Neddy Seagoon to investigate the following weekends walking activities. On our way there, Neddy in his usual sophisticated way kept mumbling about Some Charlie who when asked, "How did your walk go?", always broke out into operatic song.+ 
 +Of course, knowing Neddy to be just a poor twisted boy I refused to be dragged into conversation by such a ridiculous statement. Leaders reporting their walks by song. What next?
  
-Of courseknowing Neddy to be just a poor twisted boy I refused to be dragged into conversation by such a ridiculous statement. Leaders reporting their walks by sonsWhat next?+To save time we stopped at the first telephone box. I had reached a stage now with this festering reportthat the vital statistics (how many went etc.) of the walk, would be enough for me to complete the report.
  
-To save time we stopped at the first telephone box. I had reached 
-a stage now with this festering report, that the vital statistics (how many went etc.) of the walk, would be enough for me to complete the report. 
 So I rang the first leader's number. The phone rang with a sexy 5% type purr. When the receiver was finally lifted I asked in my usual manner, "Would you give me the vital statistics of your walk last weekend?" To my horror a soft female voice answered, "34-24-34 with a wobble". So I rang the first leader's number. The phone rang with a sexy 5% type purr. When the receiver was finally lifted I asked in my usual manner, "Would you give me the vital statistics of your walk last weekend?" To my horror a soft female voice answered, "34-24-34 with a wobble".
  
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 To my horror again the leader broke out in to an operatic song as follows - To my horror again the leader broke out in to an operatic song as follows -
-This bloody trip's too bloody hot, This Summer walking's bloody rot, Here's a party who'd rather not, Oh bloody, bloody, bloody! 
  
-The bloody guard on the mountain train Was up to his bloody tricks again +This bloody trip's too bloody hot,\\ 
-And we couldn't reach the bloody chain, Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!+This Summer walking'bloody rot,\\ 
 +Here's a party who'd rather not,\\ 
 +Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!
  
-The bloody way is bloody long, +The bloody guard on the mountain train\\ 
-The road we took was bloody wrong, I'd sell my pack for a bloody song, Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!+Was up to his bloody tricks again\\ 
 +And we couldn't reach the bloody chain,\\ 
 +Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!
  
-The bloody Nepean's too thick to drinkTake a swim - you couldn't sink+The bloody way is bloody long,\\ 
-We've made the bloody creek -1 think, Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!+The road we took was bloody wrong,\\ 
 +I'd sell my pack for a bloody song,\\ 
 +Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!
  
-There's a bloody ban on bloody fires, Won'someone chase these. bloody fliesLookout:There's more bloody fencing wires, Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!+The bloody Nepean'too thick to drink,\\ 
 +Take swim - you couldn'sink,\\ 
 +We've made the bloody creek -1 think,\\ 
 +Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!
  
-This bloody primus is bloody good - A hot cuppa with our cold food+There's a bloody ban on bloody fires,\\ 
-And you don'have to carry firewoodOh, bloody, bloody, bloody!+Won'someone chase these bloody flies,\\ 
 +Lookout! There's more bloody fencing wires,\\ 
 +Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!
  
-The bloody creek's too bloody lowThere's hardly water to cover my toe and the bloody party's too bloody slow, Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!+This bloody primus is bloody good -\\ 
 +A hot cuppa with our cold food,\\ 
 +And you don't have to carry firewood,\\ 
 +Ohbloody, bloody, bloody!
  
-We'll never make the bloody bend, We'll climb this bloody ridge insteadAnd lunch is by the Grose'bed, Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!+The bloody creek's too bloody low,\\ 
 +There's hardly water to cover my toe\\ 
 +and the bloody party'too bloody slow,\\ 
 +Oh bloody, bloody, bloody!
  
-The best laid plans of mice and men - I'll never lead a walk again, +We'll never make the bloody bend,\\ 
-Will reach the Grose tonight at ten Oh, bloody, bloody, bloody!+We'll climb this bloody ridge instead,\\ 
 +And lunch is by the Grose's bed,\\ 
 +Oh bloody, bloody, bloody! 
 + 
 +The best laid plans of mice and men -\\ 
 +I'll never lead a walk again,\\ 
 +Will reach the Grose tonight at ten\\ 
 +Oh, bloody, bloody, bloody!
  
 Well, I was flabbergasted I was amazed, singing walks reports, what next? Well, I was flabbergasted I was amazed, singing walks reports, what next?
 +
 You poor twisted leader. (The leader who wrote the above musical report wishes to remain anonymous). You poor twisted leader. (The leader who wrote the above musical report wishes to remain anonymous).
-In order to finish this report I sent that bird-brain Bluebottle and his delinquent friend Eccles out to cover the last two walksActually I should have known better than to send these two as you can + 
-see from the following recorded interview.+In order to finish this report I sent that bird-brain Bluebottle and his delinquent friend Eccles out to cover the last two walksActually I should have known better than to send these two as you can see from the following recorded interview. 
 "Well, how did you get on?" inquired the Walks Sec. "Well, how did you get on?" inquired the Walks Sec.
-"Fine! Fine:" replied Eccles in his juvenile voice. + 
-"I know you probably got on fine, but what did you find out?" inquired the Walks Sec again, keeping his voice down to a shout. "Nothing, my Capytain's chipped in Bluebottle. +"Fine! Fine!" replied Eccles in his juvenile voice. 
-"Nothing?" roared the Walks See+ 
-"No, my Capytain" replied Bluebottle again, "The Carrington Falls +"I know you probably got on fine, but what did you find out?" inquired the Walks Secagain, keeping his voice down to a shout. 
-walk didn't go and the other led by John White ended up in Blue Gum". "By the great measurements of Sabrina", thundered the Walks Sec. + 
-"is there no walk that can go as per programme?"+"Nothing, my Capytain's chipped in Bluebottle. 
 + 
 +"Nothing?" roared the Walks Sec. 
 + 
 +"No, my Capytain" replied Bluebottle again, "The Carrington Falls walk didn't go and the other led by John White ended up in Blue Gum". 
 + 
 +"By the great measurements of Sabrina", thundered the Walks Sec. "is there no walk that can go as per programme?" 
 "Now, my poor frustrated Walks Sec. calm down", soothed Eccles, "actually John and his party of five were forced to change their walk due to bushfires, but from here I must confess, confusion over an alternate trip prevailed to such an extent that John didn't know whether he was going to Colong Caves or walking backwards to Christmas across the Blue Labyrinth. "Now, my poor frustrated Walks Sec. calm down", soothed Eccles, "actually John and his party of five were forced to change their walk due to bushfires, but from here I must confess, confusion over an alternate trip prevailed to such an extent that John didn't know whether he was going to Colong Caves or walking backwards to Christmas across the Blue Labyrinth.
  
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 Dear readers, you have just read the last of the Goon Type October Walks Report. Dear readers, you have just read the last of the Goon Type October Walks Report.
  
-=====White Ant Borings=====  +----
-This month our roving termite was sent to cover the fabulous S.B.W. Car Trial. With seven or eight cars competing, he came home with some quaint morsels of Car Trial doings.+
  
-Faced with the task of measuring the width of Wheeny Ck. bridge without a tape, the Renault crew decided to use Henry Gold as a standard of length and laid him. out several times across the bridge.+=== Photography!?!?! ===
  
-The answer of 2.78 Henrys was not accepted by the organisers as it was ruled that a "henry" was a measure used in electricity and not in +You press the button, we'll do the rest!
-length. On converting to feet and inches the answer was still wrong so they couldn't win either way.+
  
-One of the crafty questions concerned the number of blades on a windmill at a certain property along the Comleroy Road. However, there was one big fly in this particular ointment - the windmill was rotating. The first competitor along pulled up and asked the lady of the house, "Excuse me, but could you tell us how many blades on your windmill?" Somewhat mystified but very obligingly the lady replied that she didn't know but would stop the windmill so they could be counted. We believe that the last competitor to come by met with:a somewhat different reception; on slowing down they wereassailed 'by the screaming voice of a little boy from the front garden - "Yes, Mister, no need to stop, I can tell yer. There's sixteen!"+Finegrain Developing. Sparkling Prints. Perfect Enlargements. Your Rollfilms or Leica films deserve the best service. 
 + 
 +Leica Photo Service. 
 + 
 +31 Macquarie Place, Sydney, N.S.W. 
 + 
 +---- 
 + 
 +===== White Ant Borings. =====  
 + 
 +This month our roving termite was sent to cover the fabulous S.B.W. Car Trial. With seven or eight cars competing, he came home with some quaint morsels of Car Trial doings. 
 + 
 +Faced with the task of measuring the width of Wheeny Ck. bridge without a tape, the Renault crew decided to use Henry Gold as a standard of length and laid him out several times across the bridge. The answer of 2.78 Henrys was not accepted by the organisers as it was ruled that a "henry" was a measure used in electricity and not in length. On converting to feet and inches the answer was still wrong so they couldn't win either way. 
 + 
 +One of the crafty questions concerned the number of blades on a windmill at a certain property along the Comleroy Road. However, there was one big fly in this particular ointment - the windmill was rotating. The first competitor along pulled up and asked the lady of the house, "Excuse me, but could you tell us how many blades on your windmill?" Somewhat mystified but very obligingly the lady replied that she didn't know but would stop the windmill so they could be counted. We believe that the last competitor to come by met with a somewhat different reception; on slowing down they were assailed by the screaming voice of a little boy from the front garden - "Yes, Mister, no need to stop, I can tell yer. There's sixteen!"
  
 Along the Colo River road lay an old and abandoned chaff cutter. It seemed a simple matter for the competitors to estimate the weight of the counterweight on said machine. But everyone reckoned without Duncan. Arriving on the spot first, he robbed the derelict of its vital part and hid it in his car. You can imagine the terrific struggle for possession that followed when the skulduggery was exposed. Along the Colo River road lay an old and abandoned chaff cutter. It seemed a simple matter for the competitors to estimate the weight of the counterweight on said machine. But everyone reckoned without Duncan. Arriving on the spot first, he robbed the derelict of its vital part and hid it in his car. You can imagine the terrific struggle for possession that followed when the skulduggery was exposed.
 +
 P.S. Duncan finished last! P.S. Duncan finished last!
  
-"What is the number on the gear-box of the hand-punt at ....." Picture the wide unbelieving eyes of the sorely-tried Car Trialer when +"What is the number on the gear-box of the hand-punt at .....?" Picture the wide unbelieving eyes of the sorely-tried Car Trialers when they discovered that the required hand-punt was on the opposite side of the Colo River. Amid a wild clamour of threats and oaths, off came clothes and on went costumes as rivals had to swim the drink to get the clue. It was a long number and several memories, of course, wilted under the strain on the swim back - all that effort for a wrong answer! It was fortunate for the organisers that they were already in the water when the mob arrived - perhaps they had some misgivings after all.
-they discovered that the required hand-punt was on the opposite side of the Colo River. Amid a wild clamour of threats and oaths, off came clothes and on went costumes as rivals had to swim the drink to get +
-the clue. It was a long number and several memories, of course, +
-wilted under the strain on the swim back - all that effort for a wrong answer! It was fortunate for the organisers that they were already in the water when the mob arrived - perhaps they had Some misgivings after all.+
  
-Any outsider visiting Richmond cemetery at about 1600 hours on +Any outsider visiting Richmond cemetery at about 1600 hours on Saturday, 30th November could have been excused for concluding that the world had suddenly gone crackers. He would have witnessed an extraordinary sight - about twenty bods running up and down among those silent tombs, examining each and every headstone, looking intently for just one belonging to a "pioneer" who passed away in 1840! Needless to say, our pioneer rested in the longest grass in the farthest corner of the graveyard, his epitaph almost indecipherable through the ravages of time. The things people do for fun!
-Saturday, 30th November could have been excused for concluding that the world had suddenly gone crackers. He would have witnessed anextraordinary sight - about twenty bods running up and down among those silent tombs, examining each and every headstone, looking intently for just one belonging to a "pioneer" who passed away in 18401 Needless to say, our pioneer rested in the longest grass in the farthest corner of the graveyard, his epitaph almost indecipherable through the ravages of time. The things people do for fun!+
  
-====="Next Course Please, Mr. Navigator!"===== +----
-(Well, there certainly were some interesting and varied versions on our Car Trial from the competitors, but we sure didn't expect to see the one portrayed above by our Cartoonist. We're not allowed to tell who belongs to Car No. 10; but most people will agree it bears a striking resemblance to a well-known bomb driven by one of our scientific members with a degree in Meditation -- Ed.)+
  
-Hot, dry and dusty, the competitors drove up to North Richmond Hostelry where stood the organisers at their "secret control". There was Snow with a tantalising long cold pale ale in his mitt and a superior leer from ear to ear and shouting to the parched competitors- +[ Cartoon of car trial vehicle No10 ]
-"You can't stop here or you'll be penalised". This was the most unkindest cut of all - et tu Brute!.+
  
-=====Engagement=====+"Next Course Please, Mr. Navigator!" 
 + 
 +(Well, there certainly were some interesting and varied versions on our Car Trial from the competitors, but we sure didn't expect to see the one portrayed above by our Cartoonist. We're not allowed to tell who belongs to Car No. 10; but most people will agree it bears a striking resemblance to a well-known bomb driven by one of our scientific members with a degree in Meditation - Ed.) 
 + 
 +---- 
 + 
 +Hot, dry and dusty, the competitors drove up to North Richmond Hostelry where stood the organisers at their "secret control". There was Snow with a tantalising long cold pale ale in his mitt and a superior leer from ear to ear and shouting to the parched competitors - "You can't stop here or you'll be penalised". This was the most unkindest cut of all - et tu Brute!. 
 + 
 +---- 
 + 
 +=== Engagement=== 
 + 
 +There's no doubt that bushwalkers choose some odd out-of-the-way places to pop that important question. So it was with Ken Angel, who was accepted by Beverley Fletcher (of the Newcastle Tech. College & Uni Bushwalking Club) on the top of Ayer's Rock. And Beverley says she wasn't held on the edge, either.
  
-There's no doubt that bushwalkers choose some odd out-of-the-way places to pop that important question. So it was with Ken Angel, who was accepted by Beverley Fletcher (of the Newcastle Tech. College & Uni Bushwalking Club) on the TOP OF AYERS ROCK. And Beverley says she wasn't held on the edge, either. 
 Congratulations and best wishes to both of you from everyone in S.B.W. Congratulations and best wishes to both of you from everyone in S.B.W.
  
-=====Things To Come===== +----
-sacrificio pro bono publico? +
-DBBS NEWS:(Extract) +
-It is reliably reported the bushwalkers have been sighted carrying hot food with them in special light-weight containers. This averts the risk of lighting fires in a bushfire danger period.   +
-Your favourite radio-frequency cooker is now available at "____"+
  
 +===== To Normanton In The Gulf Country. =====
  
-=====To Normanton in the Gulf Country===== +- Jack Perry.
--- Jack Perry+
  
 "For one as cannot sleep in one bed too long, must get 'ence, the same as I 'ave done an' go on observing things until they die." Kipling's Tramp. "For one as cannot sleep in one bed too long, must get 'ence, the same as I 'ave done an' go on observing things until they die." Kipling's Tramp.
Line 440: Line 515:
 This was my furthest point North in this area - my next stage being south to Cloncurry. This was my furthest point North in this area - my next stage being south to Cloncurry.
  
-=====News from Wee McGregor===== +---- 
-9905 Wildwood Road,+ 
 +=== Things To Come. === 
 + 
 +sacrificio pro bono publico? 
 + 
 +__DBBS News__:- (Extract) 
 + 
 +"It is reliably reported the bushwalkers have been sighted carrying hot food with them in special light-weight containers. This averts the risk of lighting fires in a bushfire danger period. Your favourite radio-frequency cooker is now available at _ _ _ _" 
 + 
 +---- 
 + 
 +===== Don't miss out on the Christmas Party! ===== 
 + 
 +R.S.L. Hall, Elizabeth Street. 
 + 
 +Wednesday, 18th December. 8 p.m. - 1 a.m. 
 + 
 +Tickets: 17/6. 
 + 
 +Heather Joyce, Social Sec. - UM8942. 
 + 
 +---- 
 + 
 +===== News From Wee McGregor===== 
 + 
 +9905 Wildwood Road,\\
 Kensington. Maryland. U.S.A. Kensington. Maryland. U.S.A.
 +
 10th November, 1957. 10th November, 1957.
  
Line 448: Line 549:
  
 Well, things have certainly been different since I left Sydney. The plane trip had its moments - after leaving Fiji we ran into the tail of a cyclone and got thrown around quite a lot. The plane developed a sick engine at the same time and this part of the trip was interesting to say the least. Well, things have certainly been different since I left Sydney. The plane trip had its moments - after leaving Fiji we ran into the tail of a cyclone and got thrown around quite a lot. The plane developed a sick engine at the same time and this part of the trip was interesting to say the least.
-I spent a day in San Francisco (plans for several more days on the way home) and this place has got something. After breakfast I wandered about for a bit, then booked a ride on a bus around the city. You've heard about the hills and the steep roads in San Francisco - well don't you believe them any more. The places I Saw were much steeper than any of the stories had led MB to believe - they're terrific. The cable cars - Oh boy - Oh boy - the Scenic Railway at Katoomba is kid stuff to these cars and these run in the modern city streets. Up and down the hills they go with the customers hanging on like hell. It was great. In the evening I went with Nina and Mark (Nina is a niece of Dr. Harris) to the top of the Mark (Mark Hopkins Hotel, 19 stories up on top of one of these hills) for cocktails. The sight from the top as the lights of the city began to glow is undescribable - the patterns of lights - the movement of cars - the colours - a sight I shall never forget. I'm glad that San Francisco is on the return track. 
-Washington itself is a government city - it is beautiful but unattractive. The buildings are superb, but it is the trees and parks that carry the place in my eyes. The trees are everywhere and there is plenty of grass to play on. When I arrived the leaves had begun to turn colour and the day to day pageant was wonderful to behold. The soft yellows, the bold oranges and reds and the browns all took turns before one's eyes until any individual colour became lost in the overall beauty of the scene. Then COMBS the fall - the grass is patterned then covered, then buried in the falling leaves. It is truly an experience to follow the story of the leaves. 
-The countryside generally is flat and featureless - there is very little of the ruggedness seen around Sydney. Travelling out of Washington into Virginia is mostly flat going with rolling grass lands' (milk country) everywhere. The farm buildings are very pretty, but the tree colouring is the thing that one sees at this time of year. About 70 miles to the west the ridges of the Appalachians begin to 
-rise and I have been on part of the Sky Line Drive, A car trip admittedly, but we have nothing like it in Australia. It is designed so that the customers can see every beauty spot on its 120 mile length, and the look out points are quite unobtrusive. The planners have done a fine job. The scenery is superb, the Virginia dairy, lands to the east and to the west is the Shanandoah River Valley. I hope my slides can give you' some idea of tree colours and the terrain. 
-There has been too much to do to spend enough time in Washington itself yet, to get a full picture of all its beauties. One feature that 
-- 
-I have examined is the Rock Creek Park. Rock,Creek is a little dribble of water which starts up in Maryland and runs right through Washington to join the Potomac River. The whole of the banks of the creek are 
-reserved and extensive bush.  Walks can be made right through the centre of the -city, possible, I am told, to go for a whole day and have no sight of any buildings, cars, etc.  I've-visited some of its places and roamed about. Everywhere the autumn colours and the leaf carpet, so different from our land. 
  
-Elsa and Bobby arrived week ago, in time to see -the latter part of the tree colours. It was good to have them here with meAt the Moment Bobby and have colds, but they will go soon and then more trips into the country.+I spent a day in San Francisco (plans for several more days on the way home) and this place has got something. After breakfast I wandered about for bitthen booked a ride on a bus around the city. You've heard about the hills and the steep roads in San Francisco - well don't you believe them any more. The places I saw were much steeper than any of the stories had led me to believe - they're terrific. The cable cars - Oh boy - Oh boy - the Scenic Railway at Katoomba is kid stuff to these cars and these run in the modern city streets. Up and down the hills they go with the customers hanging on like hell. It was greatIn the evening went with Nina and Mark (Nina is a niece of Dr. Harris) to the top of the Mark (Mark Hopkins Hotel, 19 stories up on top of one of these hills) for cocktails. The sight from the top as the lights of the city began to glow is undescribable - the patterns of lights - the movement of cars - the colours - a sight I shall never forget. I'm glad that San Francisco is on the return track.
  
-So far tho days are warm enough, but don't think about the mornings. We'renot half way through autumn yet, but now we have to scrape the ICE off the windscreen of the car before setting out for the Lab. in the mornings.  I'll let you know later what it is like in the winters.+Washington itself is a government city - it is beautiful but unattractive. The buildings are superb, but it is the trees and parks that carry the place in my eyes. The trees are everywhere and there is plenty of grass to play on. When I arrived the leaves had begun to turn colour and the day to day pageant was wonderful to behold. The soft yellows, the bold oranges and reds and the browns all took turns before one's eyes until any individual colour became lost in the overall beauty of the scene. Then comes the fall - the grass is patterned then covered, then buried in the falling leaves. It is truly an experience to follow the story of the leaves. 
 + 
 +The countryside generally is flat and featureless - there is very little of the ruggedness seen around Sydney. Travelling out of Washington into Virginia is mostly flat going with rolling grass lands (milk country) everywhere. The farm buildings are very pretty, but the tree colouring is the thing that one sees at this time of year. About 70 miles to the west the ridges of the Appalachians begin to rise and I have been on part of the Sky Line Drive. A car trip admittedly, but we have nothing like it in Australia. It is designed so that the customers can see every beauty spot on its 120 mile length, and the look out points are quite unobtrusive. The planners have done a fine job. The scenery is superb, the Virginia dairy lands to the east and to the west is the Shanandoah River Valley. I hope my slides can give you some idea of tree colours and the terrain. 
 + 
 +There has been too much to do to spend enough time in Washington itself yet, to get a full picture of all its beauties. One feature that I have examined is the Rock Creek Park. Rock Creek is a little dribble of water which starts up in Maryland and runs right through Washington to join the Potomac River. The whole of the banks of the creek are reserved and extensive bush walks can be made right through the centre of the city. It is possible, I am told, to go for a whole day and have no sight of any buildings, cars, etc. I've visited some of its places and roamed about. Everywhere the autumn colours and the leaf carpet, so different from our land. 
 + 
 +Elsa and Bobby arrived a week ago, in time to see the latter part of the tree colours. It was good to have them here with me. At the moment Bobby and I have colds, but they will go soon and then more trips into the country. 
 + 
 +So far the days are warm enough, but don't think about the mornings. We're not half way through autumn yet, but now we have to scrape the ICE off the windscreen of the car before setting out for the Lab. in the mornings.  I'll let you know later what it is like in the winter!!!
  
 The people here are as friendly and hospitable as any we have ever met and the food!  Where we are living food is definitely one of the finer things in life. They spend more time on its preparation than we do, but the result is really something. Figures will need watching or we will really come rolling home. The people here are as friendly and hospitable as any we have ever met and the food!  Where we are living food is definitely one of the finer things in life. They spend more time on its preparation than we do, but the result is really something. Figures will need watching or we will really come rolling home.
  
-We are living with Dr. Harris in a fairly new house in Marylandabout 15 miles from the centre of Washington. It is a bit like the magazine.pictures - washing machine - T.V..- 3 radios - 2 bathrooms rumpus room with bar etc. We are extremely lucky to have been invitedhere and Dr. Harris is truly one of the best.+We are living with Dr. Harris in a fairly new house in Maryland about 15 miles from the centre of Washington. It is a bit like the magazine pictures - washing machine - T.V. - 3 radios - 2 bathrooms rumpus room with bar etc. We are extremely lucky to have been invited here and Dr. Harris is truly one of the best.
  
 My work at the Laboratory is going very well and with luck the job will be finished when we leave for home. My work at the Laboratory is going very well and with luck the job will be finished when we leave for home.
  
-Wherever I've been so far I've been impressed by the cleanliness of the-parks etc. I have not seen any litter by the roadsides-'as we seeonly too often in Sydney. The cities and towns are clean and the picnic grounds used by car travellers are delightful. The people as a whole are more conscious of the surroundings than we are. It is something to aim for in Australia. The impact on me when strolling around these litterfree areas was very noticeable and I imagine the reverse impact must be solid on visitors to our country.+Wherever I've been so far I've been impressed by the cleanliness of the-parks etc. I have not seen any litter by the roadsides as we see only too often in Sydney. The cities and towns are clean and the picnic grounds used by car travellers are delightful. The people as a whole are more conscious of the surroundings than we are. It is something to aim for in Australia. The impact on me when strolling around these litter free areas was very noticeable and I imagine the reverse impact must be solid on visitors to our country.
  
-However, we are very conscious of the beauties of our ownhomeland.  From our short experience, travelling is wonderful, it is exciting, but homecoming will be satisfying.+However, we are very conscious of the beauties of our own homeland.  From our short experience, travelling is wonderful, it is exciting, but homecoming will be satisfying.
  
-Elsa Bobby and I would like to convey through the Magazine our +Elsa Bobby and I would like to convey through the Magazine our very best wishes for the Christmas season to all the gang at the Club.
-very best Wishes for the Christmas season to all the gang at the ClUb.+
  
 So long for now, So long for now,
 +
 Malcolm Malcolm
  
 +----
 +
 +===== Paddy Made. =====
 +
 +=== Gifts. ===
 +
 +If you want gifts for outdoor types where better could you go than Paddy's? There's an enormous selection of plastic bottles, jars and containers and aluminium goods of all kinds.
 +
 +The Paddymade factory has been working overtime to cope with Christmas demands and there are good supplies of everything right now, but shop early to avoid delay and make sure of your choice.
 +
 +Sydney Bushwalkers will be spread far and wide over the map over the Christmas holidays. Wherever you are Paddy wishes you good camping and good fellowship for Christmas and the coming year.
 +
 +Paddy Pallin. Lightweight Camp Gear.
 +
 +210 Castlereagh St., Sydney. 'Phone: BM 2685.
 +
 +----
195712.1542673754.txt.gz · Last modified: 2018/11/20 11:29 by tyreless

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